I go on a lot of chatsites because the mindless drivel there gives me material for this blog. Also, in case you can't notice the blatantly obvious, I enjoy trolling as a hobby. I don't judge people for no reason. I don't look at a random person and automatically throw them into one group or another. There are certain things I notice about people. Well, not so much as notice as have it shoved in my face.
Usually the first thing I see is a username. Your username says a lot. For instance my current (badass) username on Teenspot is Opiate_of_the_Asses. My previous names have been Milk_Aenima (as well as several variations of that name), Die_eier_von_lucifer, and Discustipated. I like the names that are suitably provocative yet have a bit of a twist to them (also, Tool). Most usernames I come across are pretty normal if not interesting or intriguing. That makes me think that the person behind that username is pretty normal if not interesting or intriguing.
Let's say you have a name like "H0rny_19f_princess69". I immediately think "fucking moron" and treat you as such. If it turns out that you're actually a decent person, I apologize and carry on. But this never happens because decent people don't make names like "H0rny_19f_princess69" unless they're mentally unstable, drunk, or trolling. Choose your usernames carefully, they count for more than you might think.
The second thing I usually see is what you contribute to the conversation at hand. For example:
If you piss me off enough, I look at your profile, and these are the things I look for, although not necessarily in any meaningful order.
-Comments on you profile/pictures
This goes by the same principle of the username part. If the comments are actually conversational and not sexual/flirty in any way, then you get points on the decent scale. If not, minus points.
-Pictures
The things I look for in pictures are exposed body parts, specifically chest (for girls) and abs (for guys). I look for "artistic" instagram filters like sepia for example, and I look for duck faces. Depending of how many of the things mentioned you have, minus or plus points.
-"About Me" or Description
You get minus points if your description says anything about being bisexual below the age of 18, if you are below the age of 14, if your description has terrible spelling and grammar, or if the terms "yolo" or "swag" are anywhere in it.
That pretty much sums up what I think of you. If you don't match the description above, good job, we could be friends. If we ever meet I'll buy you a beer or something.
If you DO match the description above, get your filthy swag off my blog.
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